This week’s instalment of #ParentingWin vs #ParentingFail features the lovely Lucy from Me Being Mummy. Lucy blogs about all things make-up, beauty and hair, whilst also being a hair stylist and mummy to two lively little boys. I love Lucy’s honest approach to the not so perfect side of motherhood, which she shares openly in a way that leaves no doubt that her boys are her world.
If you’re new to my blog and series, this is my weekly feature where I ask moms to share with us their most memorable Parenting Win, which celebrates even the tiniest little victory which may seem small to the outside world but in reality it is huge to her. The flip side is the Parenting Fail story where we are able to share one of our lowest parenting moments, these can be awful (you should read mine!) or a hilariously bad situation which you’re sharing, either way, this is a non-judgemental space where the aim is to make us all realise that there is no such thing as a “Perfect Parent”.
On to Lucy’s stories …
Life is about balance. With every up there is a down. Every good there is a bad. And for every win there is a fail. So when the lovely Carly over at MomOfTwoLittleGirls offered for me to take part in her fun series: Parenting Win vs Parenting Fail, I thought it was a perfect way of addressing different sides of the parenthood coin. After all, it’s always good to reflect on a Win for its positive affirmation that one is doing a (fairly) adequate job at bringing up a human. Just as reflecting on a fail is an informative way to point out that we are not perfect and make mistakes in order to (hopefully) learn from them. So I have had a good think back over my approximate 2 years 9 months 11 weeks of parenting and picked out my two choices, keep reading to find out what they are….
#ParentingWin: Fun Mum
This one is only recent but I had to share it because, for me, it stands out as a massive personal achievement. I know it sounds so strange to say, but I am someone who really struggles to have fun. I was not ‘The Fun Mum’. You see them, these mums that bounce about like springer spaniels at the park or soft play with their kids, or who hop from one task to another with ease, thinking up genius ways to occupy their young one’s minds and managing to make even the most simplest of things FUN! They roll up their sleeves and get stuck in with activities and games and just don’t give a damn. For a long time, I really envied these mums and wondered how they could get into that mindset and have so much energy. I was always worried and anxious… about everything. Whether it was a health and safety risk, or that something would involve too much mess or noise or even that other people would be watching, thinking I was acting like a complete idiot and wondering what the eff was going on?!
Then; something changed. I got my anxiety under control, realised that I am a champion procrastinator and just decided to throw myself in without over thinking things or giving a hoot about what other’s thought of me too. And as soon as I did, remarkable things started to happen. I gained more energy, I began really enjoying myself and I realised I still have an imagination.
Rather than worrying about and prioritising clearing up mess, I realised that you have to break eggs to make an omelette and that it is all superfluous. I literally stood in my kitchen one morning and thought, I can either spend my time cleaning up a mess that will be recreated in an hour or I can just grab the kids, get the hell out and go to the park and have FUN!
I am now a springer spaniel. I go on all the climbing frames at the park. I whizz down the slide and I zoom round in circles on the roundabout. I jump into the paddling pool and play as opposed to sitting and observing from a garden chair. I make dens and build towers, blow bubbles and create masterpieces with finger paints! I have fun and therefore, so do my children. We laugh more, we play more and we share more. We are silly together. I am a fun mum. And for that, I really feel like I am winning, not just as a parent but as a human being too.
Parenting fail: Buggy Fail
This stands out in my head as the funniest memory of myself and my other half’s journey through parenthood so far. It was a couple of weeks after our eldest was born. We had done the whole nesting thing after coming home from hospital. You know, when you get back, panic that you suddenly have a real live baby person to be responsible for and you find yourself lunging from one day to the next grabbing sleep, a shower and some food wherever and whenever you can whilst well wishers come round and meet your new addition.
Bored of the four walls and with an errand to run, we decided to go for our first ‘outing’ to the shops. We loaded the car with everything we thought we needed (years later I now realise we packed everything bar the kitchen sink!), we drove to the shops and parked up. As we got the buggy out of the boot, we suddenly realised that we had absolutely no clue on how it went together, how it was meant to unfold into its usable position or even how we were meant to click the car seat onto the frame. We’d been given ‘adaptors’ but the only adaptor we had known were the electrical kind so we were looking for so
mewhere to ‘plug them in’ (I cringe and giggle about this even now, how stupid?!) and it took around 45 minutes for us to get everything set up and functioning. As it was finally ready, I was giggling so hard from nerves, relief and sleep deprived hysteria that my pelvic floor nearly failed me and the only way to stem any accidents was to sit in the open boot of the car very quickly which made me fall back with my legs up in the air! At that precise moment, our new baby woke up demanding to be fed and changed so we then decided to abandon ship and just go back to the four walls. They no longer seemed smothering and had become a much less stressful alternative by then. As my other half packed everything back in the car and I jiggled a disgruntled newborn, I turned around to see that we were actually parked directly opposite a restaurant full of diners who had sat and witnessed the whole circus. I have never got into a car as quickly as I did in that moment. Talk about mortified!
And there you have it. My parenting win vs parenting fail moments. I hope you enjoyed them!”
Oh my word. I am definitely not a fun mummy. I love this one. It reminds us all that we need to let go a little. Just a little, or a lot. They (the kids) really don’t ask that much of us. Great win!
And the Fail!!!! I’d have been mortified. I had a similar experience trying to pack the car to drive my 3 day old baby to the hospital for a blood test. Oh the pressure! Fortunately in my case no one was watching, but my mom was there, and she got some really mortifying photos as evidence! On the bright side – look how far we’ve come!
Thanks so much Lucy.
Please do check out Lucy’s blog and make sure you’re following her on her social media sites:
Twitter: @mebeingmummy
Instagram: @mebeingmummy
Facebook: Me Being Mummy
If you are interested in being featured, please do get in touch, either by commenting on this post, or sending me an email: momof2littlegirls@gmail.com
Thank you so much for letting me take part in your fun feature! It was lovely to think back over all the moments I’ve had in parenthood so far, even the fail ones as they tend to be the most hilarious! Xxx ps. Am glad I’m not the only one who struggled with a buggy! How funny that your mum took pictures of you grappling with yours!haha!
My pleasure. I sent you an email last night – the pics weren’t attached on your email. If you want to resend them I will gladly update the post. ?
Haha! Ironic…. you should look into a blogger win vs blogger fail series and I’ll feature in that too for not attaching files. Am always forgetting! Will send them to you this eve, am just wading through bath/bedtime routine!xx
Ah what a fab series! Your fail really made me chuckle – I had a similar experience when I bought a lightweight buggy to take on holiday but didn’t try it out until we got there. We were supposed to be going out for a morning walk but it took so long for me to work out how to set the buggy up that we just skipped the walk and went straight for dinner! #dreamteam
Haha! It’s funny how it takes an age to set them up in the beginning and then all of a sudden you can do it in 2 seconds flat whilst juggling a child and shopping?! Practice makes perfect I guess ?
love this series! Great idea. I love the part about letting go of anxiety. I do sometimes sit with a messy kitchen, as I decide to rather go play with my girls than spend the time stressing about cleaning (also I despise cleaning). Things will get clean eventually, but these little moments go so fast.
Yes they do. Cleaning is always going to be there but those moments fly by. Thank you for reading my stories :)
Hi, what a great idea for a post I’m glad I stumbled across it. I love that the kitchen got left so that fun could be had in the park instead #dreamteam
It’s a great feature isn’t it? If I am truly honest, it wasn’t just the kitchen, it was the whole house ? but the kitchen was where I was standing when I had my epiphany!
Lucy’s story is great. Life is all about ups and downs. If we win at something at the moment, then we may fail on the next. It is definitely all about the balance :)
Exactly! Imagine how dull life would be if it was just one long, steady, straight line ? So pleased you enjoyed the read.
I’ve never put up the car seat, it’s hubby’s job. Eisj I hope I never have to. I love these wins – shame and the fails Lucy. Big ups for sharing.
Ahhh, thank you very much :) good idea, let hubby do it… save the stress!
I need to take a leaf out of Lucy’s fun mum book. I’m the world’s worst at worrying too much about what other people are thinking and I always end up with “have fun” at the bottom of a never ending list of chores and tasks. You know I love this series and this one really made me think. Brilliant – Thanks for linking to #DreamTeam x
Thanks lovely! Can’t wait to feature you one day! ?
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