In all the years I dreamed of being a mother, of raising peace loving, respectable, intelligent, kind hearted children. In all those years I never realized that there would be so many other skills required to parent. It’s not something that just anyone can do … you have to have skills!

Here are a few of the skills required to parent children

And if you don’t have them, you either learn them, or you have to give your kids back.

Skill Required: Counting!

Accidentally giving one child more chicken nuggets than the other, means that I would be presenting them with undeniable proof of which child I love more! 

how to love your children equally - skills required to parent

Skill Required: Physical agility

I never realised how much of my days I would spend bent over picking stuff up off the floor. The alternative would be NOT picking it up and falling over it, or worse … stepping on it barefoot in the dark! 

Step On Lego meme

Skill Required: Masterchef Cooking Ability

Do you realise how much time I spend disguising certain foods as other foods, mostly chicken. We’ve had ‘roast beef chicken‘, ‘barbecued chicken sausage’, ‘tuna salad chicken‘. You name it … it’s been turned into chicken for dinner! That’s a real skill.

Skill Required: Survival

I never realised how much coffee and wine I would need to drink. Okay, maybe I don’t need the wine, but it sure makes some shitty days less shitty. 

Mom Fact Wine Dinner Winner

Skill Required: Hoarding

I never realised I’d have to become a hoarder; not just of clothing that the eldest has outgrown that the youngest might one day make use of, but also preschool artwork, random photographs that reflect nothing, random ‘gifts’ of stones, feathers, seeds, and other unidentifiable objects.

I think it’s called ‘I love my kids and am proud of them’.

Skill Required: Walking encyclopedia

The unanswerable question of “why?” This is asked by them and you, for the rest of your lives! This is a topic I have discussed in depth more recently: Top 5 Questions all Parents want Answers to … or do we?

Why is the sky blue mummy? – Them

Why are you licking the car windows? – Me

Skill Required: A Love of Animation TV

You will eat, breathe and sleep animation. Some of it you will truly love. However, some animated shows you won’t love, but they will be burned into your brain for all eternity.

When You Use A Bird To Write With It's Called Tweeting Moana Quote

There are many more, but those are the ones that spring to mind right now. Let me know if you have any others I should add?


This post is linked to the following linkys: 
Tammymum
Life Love and Dirty Dishes
2019-09-25T09:51:06+01:00April 4th, 2017|Just For Laughs, Parenting|37 Comments

About the Author:

Mom of two little girls and a bonus mum of a teen. On a quest to survive parenting two strong-willed daughters in a modern world, and getting the balance right. I am a perfectly Imperfect parent who shares the highs and lows of parenting. As a family, we love to travel and experience days out with the kids.

37 Comments

  1. Cheila 4th April 2017 at 6:07 pm - Reply

    Hahaha this was a fun post!! Especially the part where they all become equally annoying!

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 5th April 2017 at 6:47 am - Reply

      My other favourite saying is the one that goes “I love all my kids equally, except the one that sleeps, I love that one more.”

      • Cheila 5th April 2017 at 10:05 am - Reply

        Sure. That’s the best one haha

  2. artymommy 5th April 2017 at 4:00 am - Reply

    Totally. I relate!! I did a similar list late last year when I noticed how many skills I had required unknowingly since entering mommyhood. It’s here if you care to take a spin! https://artymommy.com/2016/11/02/my-must-know-how-to-list/

  3. High Heels And Fairy Tales 5th April 2017 at 8:17 am - Reply

    This made me giggle! I only have one, but I still thought #1 (chicken nugget favoritism) was hilarious! :D #FamilyFun

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 5th April 2017 at 8:40 am - Reply

      It’s really not just with chicken nuggets, it’s literally everything. I actually have to count the grapes so each one gets exactly the same. Same principle applies to whoever gets in the car first – clearly they are more special. It’s exhausting.

  4. twotinyhands 5th April 2017 at 8:17 am - Reply

    Ha ha great list, I’ve never really looked at my skill set since being Mum. Survival is definitely a new skill! I should do tidying the floor a bit more but have a tendency to just make a path through it all!! I’m looking forward to all the questions, we’ll sort of!!

    ‪Thank you for linking up to the #familyfunlinky‬

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 5th April 2017 at 8:39 am - Reply

      haha “making a path” love it!

  5. upasna1987 5th April 2017 at 11:52 am - Reply

    Could not stop laughing. I stepped onto those tiny toys in the Dark, I recite those animated poems when alone, I hoard the artwork and other memories. Here through #familyfun

  6. [email protected] 5th April 2017 at 3:24 pm - Reply

    we turn just about everything into chicken also. I got her to try kielbasa last week by telling her it was fancy hot dog

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 5th April 2017 at 3:33 pm - Reply

      Okay, what’s that?

      • [email protected] 6th April 2017 at 2:36 pm - Reply

        Its a type of sausage. Doesn’t taste much like hot dog, but she fell for it.

  7. […] Believe it or not, this is the serious version of this topic on my blog. If you want the light-hearted, slightly sarcastic version check it out here: Skills Required To Parent […]

  8. Life Love and Dirty Dishes 7th April 2017 at 1:04 pm - Reply

    That I would read so many books, but none of them aimed at me rather than kids stories! Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics

  9. Island Living 365 8th April 2017 at 6:12 pm - Reply

    Ahaha, Yes, I concur, they really do become equally annoying ;-) #FridayFrolics

  10. The Queen of Collage 9th April 2017 at 11:49 am - Reply

    You’ve got me giggling especially with the first one. #FamilyFun

  11. pinkiebag 11th April 2017 at 7:39 am - Reply

    Hi, reading this made me smile. How knew an accidental chicken nugget is a sign of favouritism #twinklytuesday

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 11th April 2017 at 7:51 am - Reply

      I know right? Kids are crazy.

  12. jade the parenting jungle 11th April 2017 at 10:09 am - Reply

    My life is all about the Disney. I drive to work humming soundtracks. I love the comment about you loving one child more if they get an extra chicken nugget! I now have a craving for nuggets and it is only 9am. Thank you for linking to #stayclassymama we hope to see you next week x

  13. Paula from Her Life Is Love 11th April 2017 at 3:51 pm - Reply

    Totally not the type of post I was expecting, but love it! I only have one child…but will I really find them both annoying if I have another? LOL #twinklytuesday

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 11th April 2017 at 3:52 pm - Reply

      Short answer – yes. :)

  14. mommyhomemanager 11th April 2017 at 5:38 pm - Reply

    Haha. Thanks for sharing! #globalblogging

  15. One Messy Mama 11th April 2017 at 6:58 pm - Reply

    Fantastic!!! Hahaha!!! “They will become equally annoying” – Amen to that! :) #globalblogging

  16. gjhleebell 12th April 2017 at 1:15 am - Reply

    Reblogged this on Musings, Mutterings and Mayhem and commented:
    Love it!

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 12th April 2017 at 1:59 am - Reply

      Thanks G. Hope you and the family are well down under! X

  17. ourrachblogs 13th April 2017 at 11:58 am - Reply

    Yes to all of this!!!! Thanks for sharing with #globalblogging

    • Mom Of Two Little Girls 13th April 2017 at 2:31 pm - Reply

      My pleasure x

  18. mummascribbles 15th April 2017 at 10:08 pm - Reply

    These are all so true! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

  19. crummymummy1 17th April 2017 at 5:22 pm - Reply

    Wiping, no-one warned me about all the wiping! #twinklytuesday

  20. Shelley 25th September 2019 at 1:39 pm - Reply

    I’d have to say patience – some days it is incredibly difficult but if you take a deep breathe and keep calm, it makes the situation better for everyone.

  21. Josie - Me, Them and the Others 25th September 2019 at 3:07 pm - Reply

    My physical agility definitely needs work, I struggle to pick my way through the toys that I refuse to pick up because my back hurts. The counting all the food things also really drives me mad! #itsok

  22. Charlotte Stein 28th September 2019 at 11:57 am - Reply

    I actually laughed out loud whilst sat watching Daisy doing gym! Thank you for the giggles, it’s all very relatable true! #itsok

  23. Helen Copson 28th September 2019 at 4:51 pm - Reply

    Love the counting one. Woe betide us if one gets more than the other – until it comes to vegetables! Although my favourite child changes on a daily (if not hourly) basis. #itsok

  24. Tracey Carr 30th September 2019 at 7:39 pm - Reply

    The skill to be an olympian multi-tasker – but the more you parent the more you hone your skills here. With time you will be able to do approximately ten things at the one time without even taking a breath! #itsok

  25. Oh gosh, I can relate to each one of these… especially the “chicken” dishes! #itsok

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