Do you ever find that what you say to your kids, and what they hear, are NOT the same thing! Like, ever! Well today I learnt a bit lesson.
NEVER TELL YOUR KIDS WHAT YOU ARE DOING IF THEY HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL! NEVER!
What I said …
This morning in my house went something like this:
“Please girls, mummy has to be somewhere early this morning. Can we hurry up a little bit?”
What they heard …
Please girls, mummy has go and do something exciting without you today so here is what I need you to do to ensure I can achieve that!
Getting Dressed
Make sure that when you are getting dressed you try on, and then discard everything you own, and then leave it lying around the house for me to pick up. You must also have numerous meltdowns during the ‘getting dressed’ process because I have all the patience in the world today!
It is also vitally important that you DON’T wear shoes today. In fact, never wear shoes again. Ever!
Breakfast
Please make sure that today you reject the breakfast you request every single day of your lives!
Brushing Hair
Also, remember to have a huge slapping fight about who will get their hair done first. Make me do the most complicated time consuming hairstyle known to any harassed mother. And then pull it out of the previously requested hair-style, and wear your hair down! Only do this just as we are getting in the car.
Getting To School
Don’t worry about taking your school bags to the car darlings, I’d love to go back into the house to collect them … and your shoes.
Whilst I am back inside the house, please have another slapping fight in the car so that at least one of you cries the whole way to school, if not both. Then when we get to school, make sure that you want me to personally deliver you to the classroom door whilst still crying and clinging to my leg. Even though most days you bolt from the school gate in your haste to be free of me.
If you can please do all of that, it would really help mommy out today. Thanks my beautiful angels.
This Is My Life!
Such is my life every single time I have to be somewhere early that requires just a little bit of cooperation from them. I guess it’s my own fault. I should know better by now. Next time I won’t say a word.
How was your morning?
Oh yes… The stalling. This happened a LOT to me.
I learned to make an issue the previous night. Make sure she had clothes out and hair chosen and so everything was eliminated before the morning. She was also told… IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS that there was no messing around.
Oh… And I needed caffeine. Lots of it. B-)
The joys of doing their hair like Elsa every day and then they go and jump on a trampoline before you leave for school and it looks messier than it did when they woke up so after all that hard work they end up going with a pony tail that isn’t even centred!
My morning was much less eventful. Though I do envy your wonderful children. Your blogging is sensational. I am so addicted to reading it. I can’t help it. You write so well that it pulls me right in
Thanks very much. X
Yw
Your welcome
LOL! I can completely understand. I’d like to say it gets better as they get older, however my teens still seem to use the bathroom, grab this or that and many other things to stall- even when they’ve had plenty of warning as to the time we are leaving!
So familiar! I never tell mine I’m doing anything while they’re at school otherwise they just start whining “we want to come” even if I’m only going to the supermarket! #itsok
So true, and so well written … even with our teenagers you wonder if telling them you are in a hurry is a positive or a negative! #itsOK
Oh this is so true, it’s guaranteed the more co-operative you need them to be, the less they will be. It does get better though (perhaps…maybe..the husband is just as bad!)
This is so true…if they listen at all! #itsok
Absolutely spot on and the older they get I think the “misinterpretation” gets even worse that’s to say if it didn’t fall on “deaf” ears – because then you get nothing out of them#itsok
Ha ha ha, this is brilliant! I’m so dreading getting to the point where my three actually understand what I’m saying to them. At least at the moment when they are complete dicks I can put it down to the fact two of them can’t even talk. Although I KNOW they know :-) #ItsOK
I think this post is fab! So many mums will be able to associate with it on so many levels. I’d like to add in the “selective hearing” too. In our house not only do they appear to mishear but also choose not to hear at all. The frustration is real. #itsok
This is so so funny, I love it! You are absolutely right, the less you tell them the better. Knowledge is power and the more they know the more ammunition they have then to mess with your head. My sister always warned me about this – never tell them anything in advance because they will absolutely torture you. So I took her advice and am very careful what I say, especially around my 4 year old. You live and learn! #itsok
SPOT ON! I read a meme that said the best way to get ready for parenting is by talking to rocks, because they have the same listening skills as kids! So true…
Fab post as always, love.
#itsok
“Please girls, mummy has to go and do something exciting without you today so here is what I need you to do to ensure I can achieve that!” haha!!! Always! #itsok
I swear my three switch off as soon as I open my mouth – it’s just white noise to them #itsok